Masculinity, Yet Again, Is Fragile
By Daniel Johnson / medium.com

Yesterday, after the posting of an article concerning the murder of Janese Talton Jackson, I went on a rant. I don’t usually go on rants, but I’m tired. I’m tired of women being killed for telling men no. I’m tired of the #notallmen brigade showing up to defend men when rape and violence against women is discussed. I’m tired of the misogyny and the hatred of Black women from Black men. While we talk a damn good game about “protecting our women” we do a much better job of killing or seriously injuring them. What the Hell is wrong with us, and why is the word no so damaging to our fragile egos?

Women should not have to feel like it is their responsibility to prevent rape, they should not have to plan routes where they will come in the least contact with men because they feel that responsibility to prevent rape. Women should not, if all things went the way they are supposed to go, fear men. But because men somehow feel as though we have some kind of ownership over the autonomy of women, here we are. In a world where women have to be vigilant because of the sheer volume of men who will stalk, harass, insult, and even kill a woman because she dares to refuse him something that he isn’t even entitled to, be it her time, her number or even a smile.

There has to be a redefinition, a new understanding of masculinity, one which allows for us to be refused and not have our fragile egos lash out with brutality towards women. Even in our online interactions with other men, such as the Wiz Khalifa and Kanye West fiasco which invariably dragged in both Amber Rose and Kim Khardashian West, we see the using of women as a proxy war, as though men cannot even bruise each other’s egos without the mention of women. As though our masculinity is not truly dominant unless we can subjugate or use women to prove that we’re “real men.”

What, then is a real man? If I have to constantly provide proof that my manhood resides in my sexual prowess or my escapades with women, then what the Hell kind of manhood is that? It is a manhood with very little self worth. It is a manhood which is deeply ingrained with Patriarchy, Misogyny and low self esteem. We have to redefine manhood, otherwise we will always tie our masculinity to our ability to “pull” women or to get women to do what we say, regardless of our inhumane methods.

One thing is clear though, this pervasive view of women has completely indoctrinated men and as a result we have men who assume that women are their property and thus are bound to do whatever we instruct them to, because let’s be honest, this street harassment is rooted in ownership and the denial of agency of women, where men view women no differently than a butcher views a piece of meat.

But enough from me, maybe you should see how reading these stories affects women as communicated by Jessica Edwards:

0.0 ·
0
What's Next
Trending Today
18 Empowering Illustrations to Remind Everyone Who's Really in Charge of Women's Bodies
Julianne Ross · 15,355 views today · When Brazilian graphic designer Carol Rossetti began posting colorful illustrations of women and their stories to Facebook, she had no idea how popular they would...
Ten Ways We Misunderstand Children
Jan Hunt · 14,803 views today · 1. We expect children to be able to do things before they are ready. We ask an infant to keep quiet. We ask a 2-year-old to sit still. We ask a 3-year-old to clean his room...
Beyond Civilization: Humanity's Next Great Adventure
Daniel Quinn · 7,669 views today · PART ONE A fable to start with Once upon a time life evolved on a certain planet, bringing forth many different social organizations—packs, pods, flocks, troops, herds, and...
Lawns Are for Suckers. Plant a Garden - for the Climate!
Nathanael Johnson · 3,556 views today · Ripping out your lawn and planting kale and peppers won’t just lead to great stir-fry — a new study finds it could make major contributions to fighting climate change...
You Should Get Naked More Often. It's Good for You.
Joni Sweet · 2,389 views today · When Nelly encouraged overheated people worldwide to get naked in 2002, he was unknowingly advocating much more than just a sexy, sweaty dance party. Sunbathing, sleeping...
How Native Americans Managed "Wild" Land Long Before Settlers
Sami Grover · 2,024 views today · When European settlers first came to North America, they assumed they were looking at "untouched" nature. Sure, there were native peoples, but history tells us they didn't...
Solidarity Is About What You Do - Not Who You Are.
R.L. Stephens · 1,694 views today · I am Black. I capitalize Black and leave white lowercased. Sure, it’s the accepted spelling, but really I do it because it feels good. My family lived in Missouri, but my...
John Lennon's "Imagine," Made Into a Comic Strip
John Lennon. Art by Pablo Stanley · 1,247 views today · This is easily the best comic strip ever made.  Pabl
Bioregional Quiz: How Well Do You Know the Place in Which You Live?
Rua Lupa · 1,226 views today · In the vast emptiness of space there are an unimaginable number of galaxies, each galaxy containing billions upon billions of stars. Looking at one galaxy we find an average...
A New Story for Humanity (2016)
102 min · 1,200 views today · Inspired by the New Story Summit at the Findhorn Foundation: a sold-out multicultural, multigenerational inquiry into a new story for humanity, attended by change makers and...
Gabor Maté: Why Our Culture Makes So Many Of Us Unhappy
3 min · 873 views today · Dr. Gabor Maté explains why it is that our culture makes so many of us unhappy, unkind to one another, miserable, alienated from ourselves, etc. Watch the full interview in Part 2.
Masculinity Is Killing Men: The Roots of Men and Trauma
Kali Holloway · 801 views today · We begin the damaging process of turning boys into men long before boyhood ends.
Why You Should Take Your Kids Out of School
Ben Hewitt · 686 views today · We don't need no education. At least not of the traditional, compulsory, watch-the-clock-until-the-bell-rings kind. As a growing movement of unschoolers believe, a steady diet...
It Didn't Start With You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are
Mark Wolynn · 618 views today · The past is never dead. It’s not even past. — William Faulkner, Requiem for a Nun
The White Man in That Photo
Riccardo Gazzaniga · 609 views today · Sometimes photographs deceive. Take this one, for example. It represents John Carlos and Tommie Smith’s rebellious gesture the day they won medals for the 200 meters at the...
Your Lifestyle Has Already Been Designed (The Real Reason For The Forty-Hour Workweek)
David Cain · 586 views today · Well I’m in the working world again. I’ve found myself a well-paying gig in the engineering industry, and life finally feels like it’s returning to normal after my nine months...
When You Kill Ten Million Africans You Aren't Called 'Hitler'
Liam O'Ceallaigh · 493 views today · Take a look at this picture. Do you know who it is? Most people haven’t heard of him. But you should have. When you see his face or hear his name you should get as sick in...
Schooling the World (2010)
66 min · 488 views today · If you wanted to change an ancient culture in a generation, how would you do it? You would change the way it educates its children. The U.S. Government knew this in the 19th...
Why People's Opinions of You Aren't Real
4 min · 480 views today · "You are what you love and not what loves you." - From Charlie Kaufman's film "Adaptation"
How Stress Affects Your Brain
4 min · 394 views today · Stress isn’t always a bad thing; it can be handy for a burst of extra energy and focus, like when you’re playing a competitive sport or have to speak in public. But when it’s...
Load More
Like us on Facebook?
Masculinity, Yet Again, Is Fragile